Resting in Peace
by SassySlytherin
Summary: Fifteen years after Hogwarts, Harry and his children reminisce about the time before she left them. DON'T MISINTERPRET THE TITLE! Just don't jump to conclusions, or stereotypes...


A/n: All I want to say is that the song incorporated is by Yellowcard, an awesome band. Oh, and also not to let the title fool you, just don't take 'Rest in Peace' as most people do, associating it with death. So, without further ado, here's the story.

center Resting in Peace /center 

Harry Potter sat at the head of his dining room table, surrounded by his three children. They had piled gifts before him, and he had to smile at their efforts. His eldest daughter Lindsay stood to his left, her soft green eyes sparkling with excitement. Dark, unruly hair that would rival his own hung from the head of his son Ricky. The littlest, Blaze, had the only brown eyes of the family. At least, b now /b she did.

Hesitantly, Harry started in on the presents before him, upon the insistence of his children. They took their seats around the glass table as he picked up the first gift. Harry painfully noticed that the chair to his right was empty, and shook his head solemnly as he unwrapped the parcel.

It was from Blaze, and was a finger-painted masterpiece obviously made at her muggle preschool. The image depicted the family; Lindsay apparently chasing Ricky, and Blaze standing before her parents, her mother's hands on her shoulders and Harry's arm around his wife. Harry mournfully ran his finger over the image of his wife; Merlin did he miss her…

"This is lovely, Blaze, thank you," Harry said, forcing a smile directing at his youngest daughter. She beamed proudly in return.

Next Harry picked up a gift that had obviously wrapped by his impatient seven year old. Sending a chuckle toward Ricky, who grinned back, Harry tore off the paper to reveal what he knew to be a mobile phone. Looking curiously to his son, Ricky piped up," Well, my friend at school that anyone who has one picks up tons of girls. I figured you might want one now," he said, fidgeting a bit in his seat. Harry knew that in their hearts, his children didn't want a new woman around. They knew he didn't want one either; there was no one else for him after her. His kids were just trying to make their daddy feel better, Harry acknowledged, but he knew they were hurting too. All fairly young, Lindsay about to go to Hogwarts, Harry knew it was hard for them to accept; especially for Blaze, who probably didn't fully understand.

However, Harry smiled at his son's explanation. "How very thoughtful of you, Ricky," he commended, and his son smiled back, but only slightly.

Neatly and primly wrapped, Harry knew that the next present was from his orderly daughter Lindsay. How much she took after her mother nowadays, how proud she would be of her…Harry picked up the package, winking at Lindsay, and began to unwrap the gift. When he finished, he found some things he certainly hadn't expected. Her wand, eight and one half inches, rosewood, with the tail from a unicorn…The diamond necklace Harry had given her on their tenth anniversary, still shining wonderfully…And, her wedding ring. He clutched the small, yet invaluable object in his hand, the diamonds digging into his palm.

He just wanted to feel the warmth that had radiated through her fingers onto her ring, probably one of the last things she wore before she went away. That old anger burned inside him, wondering how she could have left him and their children like she did. But the fury was quickly calmed by the distress missing her caused, and he collapsed onto the table in dry sobs.

He felt small arms wrap around his neck in a second, and looked up to see Blaze, staring at him with wide eyes. "Don't cry, Daddy," she told him. Harry smiled faintly and took his small daughter into his arms. He had promised himself on that day long ago, that he would not let his children see him break down, and mentally scolded himself now. He had had enough time to get over the fact that she was gone, but he didn't think he would ever obtain the ability to accept that he would never see her warm, beautiful smile again.

Kissing his little one on the cheek, Harry released her and approached his son. Playing cool, or at least attempting to, Ricky just accepted a ruffling of his hair, but Lindsay stood and hugged her father tightly. "We miss her, too, Daddy," she whispered.

He pulled back from his daughter's tearful eyes, nodding and he said, "Well, I really want to thank you for this, kids. I just need to be alone for now, alright?" His children nodded. "You can visit next door, but other than that, please don't wander about." The three youngsters nodded again, and Harry nodded in return as he turned to make his way to his bedroom.

Slowly climbing the stairs, Harry finally made it to his room, and let himself fall onto the bed. Closing the door with his wand, he then set the magic stick on the bedside table. Just as he had done for the past two years, Harry laid down on her side of the bed, sniffing as always for the scent of her that had faded so long ago. Oh, what he would give just to be able to hold again, or watch interact with their children. He mourned how quickly the stable life he had grown accustomed to had been ripped from his grasp.

I'm just so tired

Won't you sing me to sleep?

And fly through my dreams

So I can hitch a ride with you tonight

Harry closed his eyes, and a scene began to play in the darkness.

I She was bent over an old map, Harry and her colleagues surrounding her, tuned in to every order she gave; pointing to each one, and then a spot on the map. /I 

He quickly opened his eyes; he had seen this before and had no desire to view it again. The last few hours before she would leave him had played themselves over and over in Harry's mind, and were utterly painful to watch. Knowing that had one thing gone differently that night, he would still have the love of his life.

So he kept his eyes open, though his ever-present fatigue protested, and he allowed them to wander across the room. Harry had not changed a single thing about it since she had been gone, leaving everything of hers untouched. The dress she had planned to wear that night hung on one of the doors to her closet, a purple sparkly number with thin straps. Harry got up and went to the dress, running his fingers over the silky material. Harry turned the other doorknob to open her closet, and stepped inside.

As the room had been scented that day years ago and had been opened only twice since; on the anniversaries; the smell of strawberries wafted through Harry's nostrils, her smell. Just like he'd done the year before, Harry thumbed through the items on her racks, remembering the occasions on which she'd worn each outfit. Bending down, he briefly ran his hands over her many pairs of shoes, which ranged from sneakers of the same brand teenagers today wore, to formal heels. Only one pair was missing…Harry rose again and glanced over her purses, all line dup neatly on a shelf. Shaking his head as if it would shake the painful memories from his mind, Harry exited the closet.

The walk-in closets of the bedrooms, Harry remembered as he plopped down on the bed again, was one thing that had really appealed to her about this house, almost fifteen years before. Newly wed and happy, she hadn't wanted him to spoil her with a gigantic house. So, they had agreed on this one. With five bedroom and three bedrooms, the house provided them with the space they would need to start a family. But what she had really loved was behind the house; the many acres of free land, scattered with trees, had caught her eye and she fell in love with the idea that her children could explore and run free without ever stepping off their property.

The bed that Harry now lay upon had been entirely her selection. Letting her choose and buy whatever she wanted to furnish the house, the bed had been one of her favorite items. Softer than ever imaginable, and close enough to the ground that his petite wife could climb up onto it, but long enough so that Harry could comfortably fit his tall frame, the king-sized bed was nothing short of perfect. Falling asleep on a bed that housed so many memories and beginnings made Harry feel close to her, it was one of the few things that allowed him to feel a connection with her anymore.

Rolling over to her side again, Harry buried his face in the pillow that had added to her comfort for so many nights. How he wished he could wake up once more to see her gracefully resting against this pillow. Harry sighed longingly; though her departure had caused so much pain, he'd go through it all over again if she would come back to him. But Harry knew that such a thing would never happen, and he would spend the rest of his life missing her with all his heart.

And get away from this place

Have a new name and face

I just ain't the same without you in my life

However, this day ached much more than any other day of the year. Had she stayed, it would be their fourteenths wedding anniversary. And since she had not, it was two years since her exit from Harry's world. Yes, it had been twelve years since their marriage on the day she left. They were to go out that night, to a fancy restaurant to celebrate. They had planned to leave the kids with her mother, and Harry had rented a tuxedo to match the elegance of the purple dress she would wear for the evening. But they had never taken up their reservation, the events of that day not being something to celebrate.

Harry's eyes fell upon her dresser, whose surface was neatly lined with products, as well as various knickknacks. Approaching the bureau, he began to pick up certain things, examining them each in turn before discarding them for another item moments later. Dazzling purple earrings sparkled in Harry's palm, and he imagined how gorgeous they would have looked hanging from the ears of his love. They had been purchased specially for the occasion, so they had never been worn. He carefully set them down, and by memory, Harry selected and slid a slim spray bottle across the top of the dresser. He bent and removed the cap, and sniffed at the bottle, to be met with the glorious scent of strawberries a la crème. It was Harry's perfume of hers, and he clearly remembered the last time she wore it. His wife had sprayed it on that morning as a teaser of what he couldn't have until later that night. But he hadn't received anything but heartache that evening.

Going through several other things, such as a diamond-studded bracelet Harry had given her one Christmas long ago, and the anklet she always wore to the beach, Harry closed his eyes, remembering it all. Another image passed through Harry's mind.

I All the other Aurors had been sent out on their respective paths, but the leader of the circle had held Harry back. She captured him in an unexpected, passionate kiss that her husband immediately responded to. Being the feisty little woman that she was, she had the kiss fueling other desires as they broke apart. "Just in case we don't get to later," she said with a smile, then Appartated without another word. Harry just assumed that she meant the kiss if things got crazy later and they didn't get a chance to go to dinner after all. Little did he know that as he too set out to find the culprits, that she would turn out right, but not because the raid ran late. They wouldn't get to lock lips again that night, or ever again. /I 

Harry had to wonder, as he opened his eyes, if his wife had known what was going to take place. He had always thought their relationship so strong. After a mistletoe kiss on the last Christmas spent at Hogwarts, that had ignited new feelings for him, she and Harry began a blissful romance that shocked everyone. Though most knew that she had always harbored a love for Harry, all thought that Harry viewed her as more of an annoyance than a friend the majority of the time. That had actually held some truth, until Harry finally looked at her and saw her for what she was, past the false exterior she fruitlessly wore to try and mask her real feelings. No one viewed her the way Harry did, even her past few boyfriends failed to notice her true beauty, inside and out. Over the years Harry had thought nothing of the other guys and didn't care who she dated, just glad it wasn't him, but he became thankful that she had not stayed long with any of them. She was meant to be his, and no one else's.

Well, someone else sure had her now, Harry admitted with a sigh. He wondered if she ever thought of him, or missed their children. Harry desired with all his might that she could be with them. But that was one desire that, despite his fame and fortune, could not be fulfilled.

Late night drives

All alone in my car

I can't help but start

Singing lines from all our favorite songs

For Harry's fortune had grown since he left Hogwarts. After graduating, Harry led a successful career as a Chudley Cannon. Playing seeker beside his best mate Ron as he kept goal for Britain's best was like a dream come true. Yes, it had occasionally separated him from his new wife for longer than he would've liked, but otherwise Harry had a blast. Once Lindsay had been born, three years into his career, his wife would bring his daughter along to the local matches. The four years after were spent this way, and each member of the Potter family was content. Harry didn't have to go away that often, and his high-paying salary made their home comfortable.

Harry wandered over to her sacred vanity, and sat down on the cushioned bench. She had treasured this piece of furniture, as it had been passed down from generations of females in her family. She had done everything to make sure it remained in mint condition over the years, and her efforts had not proved futile. Harry ran a finger over the fine wood that composed the vanity, marveling at how well she had kept it. His hand straying from the surface, away from her brushes and muggle electronic devices she used to fix her hair, Harry opened the left middle drawer, purposely selecting it because of its contents. Harry leaned forward and removed a small blue box, lifting the lid and setting it aside. He peered into it, his eyes glancing over every single folded piece of parchment. Picking one out with a shaky hand, Harry immediately noticed that however faded each note was, this one had by far lost the most color. He opened it up and read the words of his first ever letter to her, an excuse for a poem that she had nevertheless adored.

I b Hello my dear, my beloved G

I am writing in response of the letter you sent me

How funny it seems to be writing in rhyme

But I hear it gets the girls all the time…grin

Yet I only want one girl, and that girl is you

I admire everything that you do

How your framed hair accents your pretty face

And those enticing eyes that cause my heart to race

And I love and adore all that you are

To some you're just you, but to me you're a star

But however true all these things may be

They are not why I have written to thee

The reason I wrote was simply to say

I love you, and I'll see you later today

Love, Harry /I /b 

He had sent the letter early in the morning, unable to sleep, and he laughed now as he remembered rousing a grouchy Hedwig to consciousness so she could deliver the poem. Of course, when his girlfriend had met him that morning, she greeted him with an appreciative hug and kiss. Harry smiled at the memory.

The former Gryffindor spent the few hours flipping through each and every note had ever given her, laughing at random memories. The last year at Hogwarts had been tremendously enjoyable for the couple, and Harry relived almost every moment of it through these letters. When he finished the notes, he read the many cards she'd received from him over the years, for birthdays, anniversaries, and other holidays through the years, and they all began, 'My beloved G.'

Harry smiled at the fact that he'd continued to incorporate the old nickname for so long. He remembered when he began calling her that, when all of Gryffindor picked up nicknames of an initial of theirs. And for the years afterward she didn't protest to being called his beloved G, so he pressed on. It was simple things like that that Harry missed the most.

With a deep sigh, Harry settled into the large wooden rocking chair along the same wall. He was immediately soothed by the comfort, and his eyes closed as sleep overcame him. It wasn't long before a dream crossed his mind, replaying the haunting images of before, and adding a few more.

I Harry appeared with a loud CRACK, and looked around. He was obviously deep in the north forests of Wales, as planned, where their criminals were said to be. Putting his wand from within the depths of his robes, Harry slowly advanced forward, toward his assigned area of search.

He looked for hours without the slightest trace of the wrongdoers. Finally he found a creek, and perched himself on a waterside rock for a refresher. Harry cupped his hands and dipped them in the water. Bringing them to his lips for a cool drink, he spilled the water as he heard a scream. Her scream. /I 

Even in his subconscious, Harry winced, knowing what was yet to come.

And melodies in the air

Singing life just ain't fair

Sometimes I still just can't believe you're gone

I As her piercing cries continued, Harry jet as fast as his legs would carry him toward her, following the horrible sound. Her screams getting louder fueled Harry to run even faster, and eventually her shrieks were glass-shattering as he made it to a clearing.

Harry froze as he found her, face to face with the evil Muggles they'd been searching for. And in that moment, he regretted his agency ever signing up to help the Muggle law enforcement catch these men. For her robes were torn and ripped, her hair disheveled, and blood ran down cuts on her face and arms. She was trying to fight them off, and it seemed a few spells had worked, but apparently the men overpowered her with their bulk. One of them dodged a red beam of sparks that shot out of her wand, and shot forward to land a kick to her stomach. Her screams filled the air once again as she collapsed, breaking Harry from his trance. He ran forward shouting, "NO!" his wand raised at the ready.

All three heads turned his head, hers more slowly. He saw her mouth contort into a small smile, and form the word "Harry…" but he turned his attention to the smirking men before him. Before either of them could put in a stupid witty remark edgewise, Harry cursed them both. The fury at the men who'd hurt his wife fueled the curse, and blew them off their feet. As he prepared to kill them, going against orders to bring him back alive, he saw three other Aurors running onto the scene. Dean Thomas yelled out, "No, Harry! We'll take care of them!"

Quickly, Harry nodded and took his cue, dashing over to his love and kneeling at her side. "Harry…" she whispered as he took her tightly into his arms. She winced at the contact.

"Oh baby, are you okay?" Harry inquired as he pulled back to examine her. Up close, he could see many more cuts and bruises aligning the features of her face. Her bottom lip was beaten and bloody, and a bruise circled her left eye. Her body was not in much better condition, gashes along her side and scrapes on her knee. Looking back to her face, it appeared as if she were struggling to keep her eyes open. "Baby, talk to me," Harry softly urged.

She slowly wet her lips and attempted to speak, her voice coming out a hoarse whisper. "I'm just so tired. Harry, you have to let me go. I'm going to die," she said, and Harry's heart sank.

"What? Of course you're not. I'll get to St. Mungo's straightaway-" Harry began.

"No, there will not be enough time," she persisted, her voice cracking. "Just listen to me, I want you to care for our children to the best of your ability, and tell them that I love them."

Harry shook his head. "I won't, because you can tell them yourself later, after we get you some help."

She sighed impatiently, but a small, painful smile graced those kissable lips. "So stubborn, you are Harry. Just please do that for me after I've passed on," she requested weakly.

Lightly putting a hand to her cheek, Harry's eyes filled with tears. "Anything for you, my love. But you won't pass on, you can't. You can't leave me," he whined in a gruff voice, the tears spilling onto his cheeks.

She slowly turned her head to kiss his hand, and brought a weak hand of her own to cover his. "It's my time to go, Harry. But I shall always love you," she promised.

Harry numbly stared at his withering wife. The life was slipping from her body before his eyes, and he couldn't stand it. "I love you too. Oh, I love you too!" he cried, and he watched her smile at his confession. Losing control, Harry collapsed onto her chest, overcome with sobs and holding her tight. "But you can't leave me, I can't live without you! Please don't leave me and our children. Don't leave me, baby. I love you!" he vowed, and pulled back to look at her face. Her eyes had closed, and her lips were still set in that painful smile from minutes before. "NO!" Harry screamed. "NO! Come back!" He gathered her into his arms and cried onto her dead body. "Come back, baby, I need you!"

With that, the picture began to fade, the last glimpse featuring Harry sobbing, head bent over the face of his wife, showering her with kisses that were not received by his dead love. /I 

And I'm sure the view from heaven

Beats the hell out of mine here

And if we all believe in heaven

Maybe we'll make it through one more year

Down here

Harry jerked to consciousness in his rocking chair, his face wet with tears. It was his entire fault she was dead. He knew it, and had been blaming himself for the past two years.

Everyone who had attempted to talk him out of his depression said that it was in no way his fault. But how wrong they were. He was the reason she became an Auror in the first place. He had decided to retire from playing Quidditch, after eleven years, when Ricky was born, and stayed home with the family. But as his son grew older he was itching to get back onto the work force again, and his wife had assured him she could handle the house and family. And so Harry had looked for work, and in seven months he was dubbed an Auror. But later that same year, she grew restless with home life and surprised him by getting licensed too. The children were left with Uncle Ron when they went on raids, which weren't too often, but the children wouldn't have minded either way. They loved Ron, his wife Luna, and their two kids, who were born in between the Potter children, and was eager to spend time with them all.

Two months after their daughter Lindsay's seventh birthday, however, another daughter came along, and they named her Blaze. Her mother took leave from work after that, and Harry wanted to also, but she wouldn't hear of it. In any event, Harry still returned home almost every night.

Once his wife felt Blaze was old enough to be all right for a long period of time without her, at a year old, she left her and the other two in Ron's willing care one more. She then rejoined up as an Auror, and the force welcome her back whole-heartedly.

And three later, she would die on the job. It was the only successful raid that Harry didn't feel joyous over; for though they had found the criminals, he lost her. If it were up to him, he would've let the evil men run free had it meant she wouldn't have died that night.

But, it was his fault anyway. If he were a gentleman, he would've insisted she stayed home, seeing as they weren't in need of the extra money. If she had listened to him and not returned to work, he'd still have her. Harry had to wonder, though, if she indeed would have listened. Being the motivated woman she was, she'd probably argue that she b wanted /b to work. And he would've accepted that anyway. So Harry sighed, avoiding thinking about the I what-if? /I 's.

Since her death, Harry had not wanted to do much of anything. Caring for his children was one thing; it was instinctive. But heading out to work again just held no reward for him. Another raid would just sharpen the memory of her dying, killing Harry inside. So he decided against staying with the Auror's Agency. But, as he knew she wouldn't want him moping around the house, which was all he wanted to do, he went job-hunting. Coincidentally, the Ministry needed a new Auror recruiter, and Harry was perfect for the job. He applied immediately and was hired within three days. So that was what Harry had been doing for the past two years.

Harry plucked a tissue from a box on a nearby table and mopped up his face. He had to make dinner for his children, and he didn't want them to know he'd gotten himself worked up thinking of their mother. Standing and checking the mirror quickly before heading out, Harry took a deep breath as eh started toward the kitchen.

Descending the stairs, he noticed how quiet the house was. Not a sound could be heard, so Harry assumed his kids had gone to visit next door with Ron, Luna, Arthur, and Brian. Their father didn't blame them for not wanting to be around when he was overtly reminiscing about the past. Still, he entered the kitchen and started dinner, knowing they'd return home in time.

About halfway through the meal preparation; when the potatoes were skinned and ready to be mashed, the steak almost done and the corn on the stovetop; Harry head the backdoor behind him open. Not turning around, he hoped against all hope that it would be his wife to tap him on the arm, and spin him around to kiss him lovingly. The desire was crushed when he felt small arms wrap around him and a head pressing to his side, but his mood still brightened a bit. "Are you okay, Daddy?" said the muffled voice of his daughter.

"Yes, I'm fine, Linds," he assured her, however untruthful it was. At least that what he said next wasn't a complete lie. "Your gifts just brought back memories of your mum."

Feel your fire

When it's cold in my heart

And things sort of start

Reminding me of my last night with you

Lindsay nodded, and squeezed him tighter before she pulled away, looking up at her father with questioning eyes. "When does it stop hurting, Daddy? When do we stop missing her?" she inquired. Lindsay, who had the most understanding of her mother's death, was asking insightful questions.

Her father's answer came almost immediately. "Never, baby. The pain will dull over time, though, and eventually memories of your mum will make you happy. And one day, we will all see her again," Harry vowed, more to himself than his daughter.

She seemed to think it over, before replying, "Yeah, that makes sense. Thanks, Dad." And she hugged him once more. Harry smiled and embraced her, running a hand over her hair. Lindsay grinned as she broke away, and gave a little wave before starting up to her room.

As Harry went back to his cooking, his mind pondered his older daughter. Eleven years old, she would be attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry soon, the same place it had all started for her father and mother so long ago. Seeing her onto the school express would be a big step for Harry, letting go of one of the things that kept his wife's memory close to him. Watching their children every day allowed Harry to feel as if she were still with them, so he had to worry that by sending one of them away, the feeling of her being near would fade. But Harry wouldn't dare restrict Lindsay from going to the magic school she was so eager to attend, having heard many amazing stories from her parents over the years, for his selfish reasons. No, his daughter would go and be happy at hOgwarts, no matter how much it hurt him.

Her being happy at Hogwarts was also a matter in question to Harry's mind. As her mother's death had been all over paper covers two years ago, he worried for her well-being. Being the object of unwanted attention at school himself, Harry feared that her fellow classmates would taunt her over how her mother had died, by the hands of Muggles, or just tease her that she didn't have a mummy anymore. But, Lindsay was adamant about going, and he wasn't going to stop her.

Harry set about finishing dinner, and one by one his children all came home. Blaze returned home before her brother, making Harry bend so she could give him a kiss hello before skipping away. Ricky stayed much longer, seeing as the Weasley children were boys and they bonded much more. But eventually, he too came home, just as Harry and Lindsay were setting the table.

Dinner was a fairly quiet affair, the silence only broken by an occasional 'Can you pass me the sush and such?' As the plates were emptying and his children were becoming full, however, Harry spoke up. "I'm really sorry about the way I acted before, guys. And I want to let you know how much I appreciate your reaching out to me. These past two years have been hard for us, and we need to stick together, and you all have done a great job. I just wanted to thank you again for trying to make the day brighter," he finished. This time, every one of his children came up and hugged him before bidding him goodnight.

After clearing and washing the dishes, Harry sighed and headed up to his bedroom, once again alone. As he made the short journey he wondered if it would ever stop bothering him that she never ascended the stairs with him to bed anymore.

I only need one more day

Just one more chance to say

I wish that I had gone up with you too

Upon reaching his room, Harry changed into his muggle pajamas, and settled into bed. But his sleep was haunted with the horrible memory of the moment he had told his children of his mother's passing.

I "W-what?" Lindsay was the first to speak, with a quivering tone.

Harry tried to keep his emotions in check and his voice steady. "Your mother was killed in the raid, baby. I'm so sorry," he said, his eyes filling with tears.

With that, a two and a half-year old Blaze burst into loud wails, tears spurting from her eyes. Her sister, seven years her senior, immediately rushed to her aid, silent tears streaming down her own cheeks. The kindergartener of the family, Ricky, just stared at his father in disbelief. "No," he said quietly.

Harry sighed. He knew Ricky would be the one in denial out of his children. He gently took his son's shoulders in his hands. "It's alright, Ricky," he said, attempting to pull him into a hug.

"NO!" Ricky yelled, pushing his father away. "No! She's not dead!"

"Ricky-" Harry tiredly started.

"NO! She's not gone! She'll be back! She just stayed late to help them lock up the bad guys!" he insisted. "She'll be here when I wake up tomorrow." And with that, he stormed up the stairs and ran off to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

Harry exhaled heavily, and turned to his sobbing daughters, engulfing them both in his embrace. "Oh, girls," he sighed tearfully. Blaze's cries were growing louder, and Lindsay's were starting up as well.

Blaze whimpered, "I wan my mummy…I wan her now…"

"I know, baby. So do I," Harry said, which began a new fit of tears for the toddler.

Ricky was proven wrong. When Harry stepped into his son's bedroom the next morning, weary and fatigued, his son's arms were crossed as he lay on his bed, and he was staring up at the ceiling with his lips set in a firm line. Upon closer inspection, Harry could see the tears rolling sideways down his cheeks and into his ears. He sat on the bed beside his five-year old, who didn't flinch.

"She lied," he said simply. Harry didn't say a word, figuring an explanation would follow. Ricky picked up a hand to swipe the back of it over his stuffy nose, and then it assumed its previous position under the other as he spoke, "She lied to me. She came to me in my dreams, and said she would be right here with me. But she's not. She's in heaven, and I'll never see her again," his son only sounded angry, not upset.

"That's not true, Ricky. We all will see her again one day, when we make it up to heaven," Harry promised.

And I'm sure the view from heaven

Beats the hell out of mine here

And if we all believe in heaven

Maybe we'll make it through one more year

Down here

"You don't know that, Daddy," he said with a pout.

"Yes, I do. You are such a good little boy that when you pass on you will be granted access to heaven, I am sure of it. And then you will be with Mummy again," Harry said.

Ricky said not a word, only looking to his father's face. After searching it a moment, he burst into tears, and cried his little heart out, clinging to Harry who held him tight. "She's not coming back, she's gone!" he sobbed, and this caused Harry's own tears to spill over once more…

/I The picture faded, and Harry's mind moved to the date of her funeral… I 

Harry and his three children, along with her parents, were seated in the very first row, before her open coffin. His children had had to be purchased black clothing for the ceremony, as they didn't own any. Lindsay and Blaze's little black dresses were similar, and nine-year old Lindsay wore a black veil over her face, at her request. Ricky was dressed primly in a little black suit, and it broke Harry's heart to see his children dressed so darkly, for such a dark occasion. They all listened to the minister's speech, all with teary eyes. Eventually, the minister called Harry up to speak.

With a shaky sigh, Harry got up and stood behind the altar. His eyes were filled to the brim as he spoke, "You know, this is where it all began, in this church. She and I were married here twelve years ago. What a joyous occasion it had been, one of the happiest moments of my life. And another came along, three years later, when my Lindsay was born," he smiled at his daughter, a few tears spilling out in the process. "Four years later brought our son Ricky, and Blaze came along three years after that. Now, my wife was an incredible mother. Between my absences when I was both a Quidditch player and an Auror, she took care of our house and family with ease. Yes, it exhausted her sometimes, and that was when I'd step in to help. For she never wanted help," Harry remembered, more tears sliding down his cheeks as he grinned, "She always wanted me out, pursuing my dream, or helping people and saving lives in my late profession. More selfless than anyone else I have ever known, my wife was the best a man could ask for. That's why it breaks my heart," Harry paused as his voice cracked, "to see her lying here, lifeless. All she had ever done to anyone was been kind and caring, and she was dealt the card of death. How unfair and cruel it seems to my children and I, who are suffering tremendously. There could never be anyone to fill her shoes, never anyone who could even be half the woman my wife, and their mother, was. We will forever mourn the loss of her, and we miss her terribly. So, my beloved G," Harry said, a sob escaping his throat, "if you are listening, we love you." And with that, Harry stepped down from the front, and resumed his seat, proceeding to hug his weeping mother-in-law.

"That was a beautiful speech," she whimpered to him through her tears.

"Nothing but the truth," Harry replied, smiling weakly at her.

"Oh, you," she said, patting Harry on the arm, and releasing him.

He held a crying Lindsay's hand through the rest of the ceremony and when it was time to go, she didn't move. "Come on, baby, we've got to go to the…the burial," Harry could hardly manage to say the word, as it shattered his heart.

Lindsay said nothing, but she let go of her father's hand and abandoned her chair. Walking up to her mother, lying there in her most beautiful blue silk dress, her hair done nicely around her face, Lindsay suddenly collapsed onto her, screaming out, "MUMMY! MUMMY, COME BACK!" she sobbed. A minute later, her younger sister followed suit. Ricky just sat motionless in his seat, watching the scene. Harry had to choke back his tears as he went over and scooped up his girls, who immediately held tight to him, as though if they squeezed hard enough, their mother would come back. But she would never hold her babies again… /I 

You won't be coming back

And I didn't get to say goodbye

Goodbye, I really wish I got to say goodbye

Harry awoke, but he didn't want to open his eyes. His nightmares were too painful, his heart felt as if it had been broken all over again. His sheets were tangled around him, as if he'd been rolling about in his sleep. But he paid them no mind. Sighing deeply, Harry bent his arms behind his head and thought of his goddess. Happy thoughts, this time. Their wedding, a blissful occasion that was concluded with an unforgettable night of passion. His first match won as a professional Quidditch player, with her whooping and hollering in the stands. The birth of their first child, she was so nervous, and to be totally honest, so was he. The Christmas that she had informed him she was pregnant with their second child, and his birth. The hour before his first raid, with her assuring him he would do fine. Lindsay's first day of school, where his daughter had kicked and screamed she didn't want to go. And then the first raid she participated in, scared but confident. Blaze being born, and Harry getting to hold her for the first time, his wife happily looking on. The first time at school for Ricky, who handled it much better than his older sister. Many more successful raids with his love at his side. And the first time Blaze attended her preschool, not too long before his wife's death.

With that, his happy memories died, and he was solemn again. But his dreary thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his door. "Daddy, can I come in?" called the subdued voice of his son.

"Sure, Ricky," Harry answered, and Ricky opened the door, his face upset, and yet glowing.

He climbed onto the bed beside his father and said, "I dreamt of her last night."

"Really?" Harry asked, propping himself up against the headboard.

"Me, too, Daddy," said a small voice from the open doorway, and within seconds Blaze was curled up under her father's strong arm on the bed.

Harry just stared at the doorway after that, half-expecting Lindsay to walk through as well. Ironically enough, minutes later he heard footsteps down the hall, and she appeared at his door. "Daddy? I had dreams about Mum…"

"Yes, so did everyone else," Harry said with a small smile. "Come on up."

Lindsay grinned and joined her family on the bed, laying against her father's chest next to her brother.

It was moments like this, cuddling with his children, that pulled Harry through.

And I'm sure the view from heaven

Beats the hell out of mine here

And if we all believe in heaven

Maybe we'll make it through one more year…

Ricky and Lindsay sat arguing in the backseat, as Blaze occupied the front passenger seat as Harry drove the car toward King's Cross. His daughter was fumbling with the zipper of her jacket, pulling it up and down over and over again. Harry smiled at her anxious tactics.

"Nervous?" he questioned.

"No, not at all," she answered. Downright lie, as she smiled weakly moments later.

"Don't worry, Blaze, you'll be fine. Your mum will be watching over you, just as she has done with your brother and sister as they made it to Hogwarts," he reminded her, and this seemed to boost her spirits for the rest of the ride.

As Harry wheeled her cart through Platform ¾, Lindsay holding her hand as Ricky pushed his own cart beside them, Harry's anxiety was building. He was going to have to let go of his second daughter, his last child, in a matter of ten minutes, and he wasn't sure he could do it. Sending her on the Hogwarts Express would mean not seeing his baby for another ten months, and Harry didn't know if he could deal with that. When he returned home today, he would be alone, and the thought saddened him deeply. If she were still here, he wouldn't be alone.

Lindsay had already graduated from Hogwarts, last June. Top of her class and Head Girl, her father couldn't have been more proud, and he was sure that his wife was beaming down on their daughter. But she wouldn't be coming come with her father. At graduation, she had been offered the chance to be a student teacher to Professor McGonagall, and then take her position, as she was retiring the next year. She had jumped at the opportunity, and with her father's permission, she had accepted.

Yes, he had let her do it. Though he wanted nothing more than for his daughter to stay with him as her siblings were away, he saw the excitement she felt at being given such a great prospect straight out of Hogwarts, and said she could take the job. Just the look on Lindsay's face confirmed to him that it was the right thing to do. However painful, it was indeed the right thing he could do for her.

Harry didn't even realize how much time had passed that they had been waiting, but the whistle blew and children began to board the train. Lindsay quickly approached her father and hugged him, kissing him on the cheek as she pulled away. "Thanks again, Daddy. I'll see you on my first Hogsmeade weekend," she promised, and started to move her luggage on the train.

"Bye Dad," Rick said, and Harry patted him on the back as he set off with his and his younger sister's trunks.

"Daddy, I'm scared," Blaze admitted as he crouched to embrace her. Harry kissed her on the top of the head with a smile.

"You have nothing to fear, honey. Lindsay will be in the Transfiguration room if you need her during classes, or you could always find Ricky, he'd help you too. Well, you have to go, baby. I love you," he said, and stood.

"Love you too, Daddy. Bye," his little one waved to him, and took a waiting Ricky's hand, and her brother helped her onto the train.

I hope that all is well in heaven

{All is singing in heaven…}

Cause it's all shot to hell down here

{We need you here…}

I hope that I find you in heaven

{Singing in heaven…}

Cause I'm so lost without you down here

Harry felt a tear slip out as the train began to pull away, but then an unexpected sight caught his eye. Hovering over the train was a ghostly image of his wife, a way Harry had never seen her before. She still looked as beautiful as ever, dressed in that silky blue outfit that hugged her curves. Harry got over his shock so he could bask in the sight of her, however transparent she was. She was still his beloved G to him, and he stepped forward, reaching out to her.

In return, she extended a hand of her own, and Harry felt goose bumps as their fingers touched. "I still love you, Harry," she said in a faint voice, that beautiful smile touching her lips.

"Oh, I will always love you, Hermione," Harry whispered, as she leaned in close and pressed her lips to his. Harry could've sworn he felt warmth transferred through the kiss, but when he opened his eyes she was fading away, still smiling that gorgeous smile at him.

He didn't cry out, didn't scream her name. He just reached out to her as her ghost dissolved in to thin air.

As he walked back to his car, Harry cried. But for the first time in two years, they were tears of happiness. Harry wasn't going home alone, as he had thought. Hermione would be with him.

center End /center 

A/n: Just so you know, I skipped the last verse. The song is called "View from Heaven," but I didn't want to tell you that before the story so it wouldn't give everything away. Had you guessin for a while who his wife was, huh? Well, I hope I wrote it well enough so that you were flip-flopping back and forth between the possible female characters!! :)

Do you see what I meant about the 'Rest in Peace' thing? Resting in peace, finally, was Harry, after coming to terms with the fact that Hermione would never really leave him. Get it??? Bet you do now! :)

Please review!

Laura


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